Hey that's the loser I dumped
in order to go out with you.
Boy am I glad I ever got away from her.
What a moron.

I think that's the girl I knew from high school
who was committed to an asylum
and turned out to be a real nut case.

Look at that guy ... over there ... behind the woman.

I can't believe that outfit she is wearing.
(Said disdainfully)

I know you're probably thinking
I was staring at a beautiful woman,
but to me she is like one of those
fancy bakery cakes that looks good,
but then you have a bite
and it is so sweet that it makes you sick.
She makes me sick.
(It helps if you convulse a little at the end here ...
maybe it will camouflage your drool.)

Isn't that the actress from the movie Delicatessen?
(Chances are she hasn't seen that movie -
and neither have you,
but you will get brownie points naming a foreign film,
and it will be just obtuse enough to distract her.)

Do you think she's prettier than me?
(Give her a taste of her own medicine.)