Everyone around you has an attitude problem.

You're adding chocolate chips to your cheese omelette.

The dryer has shrunk every last pair of your jeans.

Your husband is suddenly agreeing to everything you say.

You're using your cellular phone to dial up every bumper sticker
that says "How's my driving?  Call 1-800-000-0000".

Everyone's head looks like an invitation to batting practice.

You're counting down the days until menopause.

You're convinced there's a God and he's male.

You're sure that everyone is scheming to drive you insane.

The ibuprofen bottle is empty and you bought it yesterday.