Fair enough...let's take a look at what you're asking for.
 
 There are 365 days per year available for work.
 
 There are 52 weeks per year in which you already have two days off per
 week, leaving 261 days available for work.
 
 Since you spend 16 hours each day AWAY from work, you have used up 170
 days, leaving only 90 days available.
 
 You spend 30 minutes each day on coffee breaks. That takes care of 23
 days, leaving 68 days available.
 
 You take an hour's lunch EVERY day, which takes up another 46 days,
 leaving only 22 days available for work.
 
 You normally spend 2 days per year on Sick Leave. This leaves only 20
 daysavailable for work.
 
 We are off for 5 holidays per year, so your available working time is
 down to 15 days.
 
 We GENEROUSLY give you 14 days annual leave which leaves only 1 day
 available for work, and I'll tell you this mate, I'll be damned if
 you're going to take that day off!!!