----- Lies about Love: -----
Everyone does this, it's perfectly normal.
It's dangerous to your health to get excited and then stop.
I'll stop as soon as you say.   [She's heard this one before, huh?]
I'll tell her(him) tonight.
Well, the clinic said I was clear!
Nobody can hear us.  [Yea, that's what you think!]
I'll never put myself through this again

----- Men's Lies: -----
Sex isn't everything.
This has nothing to do with my mother.
It's not your fault.
It's too late.
I read an article today.
I'm allergic to rubber.
We'll try again when we wake up.
It has a mind of it's own.
This has never happened before.

----- Party Lies -----
I'm not gonna drink too much tonight.
They'll all be wearing jeans.
There are no bones in this fish.
The neighbors are very tolerant.
Just half a glass, thanks.
He doesn't normally act like this when he's been drinking.
It's no trouble if you stay the night.

----- Salesman Lies -----
You won't see this anywhere else.
This sort of thing never goes out of fashion.
Bring it back if you don't like it.
This is a never-to-be repeated offer!
Unbelievably low prices.
It's the last one in stock.
You'll have no trouble with it.

----- Drivers Stopped by the Law Lies -----
I was just going the speed limit.
I only had one.
What stop sign?
The light was green when I started through the intersection.
He came from nowhere when I changed lanes.
Officer, I can walk without any assistance.

----- Computer Lies -----
If you have any problems, just call us.
What you see on the screen, you get on paper.
Someone must have erased my program.
They don't make those chips anymore.
If kids use them, so can adults.
Oh yeah, it's compatible with everything.
You won't need any special training.
There's no harm in trying - nothing can go wrong.
The manual explains everything.

----- Political Lies -----
He's a real honest man, believe me.
I fought to keep that bill from passing.
I promise I'll do it right.
Elect me and the country will become better
On a tombstone ---  Here lies an honest man and politician.