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Rabbit Jokes

 What are four hundred rabbits hopping backwards? A receding hare line.


An infant rabbit was orphaned. Fortunately though, a family of squirrels took it in and raised it as if it were one of their own. This adoption led to some peculiar behaviors on the part of the rabbit, including a tendency for it to eschew jumping but rather to embrace running around like its step-siblings. As the rabbit passed through puberty, however, it soon faced an identity crisis (don't we all!). It went to its step-parents to discuss the problem. It allowed as to how it felt different from its step-siblings, was unsure of its place in the universe, and was generally forlorn. Their response was, "Don't scurry, be hoppy."

Why does the Easter bunny hide his eggs? He doesn't want anyone to know he's screwing a chicken.

These two rabbits escape from the laboratory and see grass for the first time. Lollopy, lollopy, lollopy, lop, they bounce through the grass when they meet an older rabbit. "Hello," says the older rabbit. "Would you like to come and stay at my warren?" "What's a warren?" ask the two rabbits. "Don't worry," replies the older rabbit. "Come and see." So off they go and they like the tunnels and chambers of the older rabbit's warren, and decide to stay. In the morning, the two rabbits are awaken by the thumping of the older rabbit: thump thump thump. "Come on out for the cabbages," calls the older rabbit. "What's a cabbage?" ask the two rabbits. So off they go and enjoy the day in the fields eating cabbages. They return very satisfied with their tummies full of cabbage and agree a good day was had. The following day: thump thump thump, "Come on out for the cabbages", and the same for the day after that. By the end of the third day, rabbit one says to rabbit two, "These cabbages are good but there must be more to life. Let's go and find it." Rabbit two agrees, so off they go lollopy lollopy lollopy lop across the grass. They meet a younger rabbit. "Hello," says the younger rabbit. "Why don't you come and live in my warren. I got young girly rabbits in my warren." So they agree and for three days, it was thump thump thump. By the end of the third day, rabbit one says to rabbit two, "Oh man, I gotta get out of here." "WHY?!?" asks rabbit two. "This is the best time of our lives!" he exclaims. "Yeah," says rabbit one, "but it has been a week since I've had a cigarette."
This article was added to LaughNet on Wednesday 23 March, 2005.


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