--- Where there is a will, I want to be in it.
--- IRS - we've got what it takes to take what you've got
--- We are born naked wet and hungry, then things get worse
--- Make it idiot proof and someone will make a better idiot
--- Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder
--- Give me ambiguity or give me something else
--- It's lonely at the top but you eat better
--- The lottery - a tax on people bad at math
--- If men are idiots, you married their King
--- Constipated people don't give a crap.
--- If that phone was up your rear, maybe you could drive better.
--- To all you virgins, thanks for nothing.
--- If you can read this I've lost my trailer.
--- This would be really funny if it weren't happening to me.
--- So many pedestrians - so little time.
--- If we quit voting will they all go away?
--- Illiterate? Write for help.
--- Where are we going and why am I in this handbasket?
--- Seen on the back of a biker's vest -- If you can read this, the bitch fell off.
--- Seen upside down on a jeep -- If you can read this, please flip me back over.
--- Seen on a baby stroller -- Saw it ...Wanted it ...Had a fit ...Got it!
--- Remember folks stop lights timed for 35mph are also timed for 70mph.
--- Caution - Driver legally blonde!
--- Don't be sexist - broads hate that.
--- Heart attacks -- Gods revenge for eating his animal friends.
--- Honk if you've never seen an Uzi fired from a car window.
--- If you can't dazzle them with brilliance, riddle them with bullets.
--- What has four legs and an arm? A happy pit bull.
--- Guys, no shirt, no service; gals no shirt, no charge.
--- This property protected by smith and wesson four days a week - - you guess which days.
--- Don't piss off the crazy person.
--- My kid had sex with your honor student
--- If it was raining whores, I'd be the one to get hit with the queer.
--- Prevent inbreeding ... Ban Country Music!