Conference Call Services
Dog Ramps Valentine cards
LaughNet
Gator bar

Subscribe to LaughNet Daily Jokes in Your Mailbox Daily
  Home » Computers »
Search
Search Body
Categories
Aging (14)
Bloopers (19)
Blue Collar (11)
Cartoons (38)
Computers (83)
Crude (42)
Education (58)
Gender (89)
Holiday (36)
How To's (7)
Jokes (45)
Misc. (119)
Parenting (17)
Pets (18)
Photos-> (44)
Politics (22)
Religion (24)
Sci-Fi (8)
Songs (6)
Sports (6)
Tests (16)
Workplace (90)
What's New?
A list of redneck computer terms
The HMO FAQ
Rednecks Reply - A Quiz for the Yankee



Cardwoo Buy

Annual Internet Cleaning

 

To: All Internet Users
From: Kim Dereksen
      Interconnected Network Maintenance staff
      Main branch, Massachusetts Institute of Technology
Subject:  Internet Cleaning

PLEASE PASS THIS NOTICE TO OTHER USERS WHO MAY NOT SEE IT!

As many of you know, each year the internet must be shut down for 24
hours in order to allow us to clean it.  The cleaning process, which
eliminates dead e-mail and inactive ftp, www and gopher sites, allows
for a better-working and faster internet.

This year, the cleaning process will take place from 12:01 a.m.
GMT on April 1 until 12:01 a.m. GMT on April 2.  During that
24-hour period, five very powerful Japanese built multi-lingual
internet-crawling robots (Toshiba ML-2274) situated around the
world will search the internet and delete any data that they
find.

In order to protect your valuable data from deletion we ask that
you do the following:

1. Disconnect all terminals and local area networks from their
   internet connections.
2. Shut down all internet servers, or disconnect them from the
   internet.
3. Disconnect all disks and hard drives from any connections to the
   internet.
4. Refrain from connecting any computer to the internet in any
   way.
5. Avoid placing operating microwave ovens or toaster/toaster
   ovens near your computer modem.
6. Avoid wearing nylon (or other dielectric fiber) undergarments
   because of the possibility of electrical discharge.

We understand the inconvenience that this may cause some internet
users, and we apologize.  However, we are certain that any
inconvenience will be more than made up for by the increased speed and
efficiency of the internet, once it has been cleared of electronic
flotsam and jetsam.

We thank you for your cooperation.
Kim Dereksen
Interconnected Network Maintenance staff
Main branch, Massachusetts Institute of Technology


Sysops and others:  Since the last internet cleaning, the number
of internet users has grown dramatically.  Please assist us in
alerting the public of the upcoming internet cleaning by posting
this message where your users will be able to read it.  Please
pass this message on to other sysops and internet users as well.

Thank you.

This article was added to LaughNet on Monday 14 March, 2005.


Save Annual Internet Cleaning to del.icio.us Save to del.icio.us
  |   Digg this Annual Internet Cleaning Digg this   |   Google Bookmark Annual Internet Cleaning Google Bookmark this   |   Add Annual Internet Cleaning to Yahoo myWeb Add to Yahoo

Reviews
Reviews
  Home » Computers »

LaughNet page design is copyright (C) by Stephen Henry and may not be copied . All material is believed to be in the public domain. If an article does not have the appropriate credits please Contact us.