a.. Ratio of an igloo's circumference to its diameter: Eskimo Pi

b.. 2000 pounds of Chinese soup: Won ton

c.. 1 millionth of a mouthwash: 1 microscope

d.. Time between slipping on a peel and smacking the pavement: 1 bananosecond

e.. Weight an evangelist carries with God: 1 billigram

f.. Time it takes to sail 220 yards at 1 nautical mile per hour: Knot-furlong

g.. 365.25 days of drinking low-calorie beer because it's less filling: 1 lite year

h.. 16.5 feet in the Twilight Zone: 1 Rod Serling

i.. Half of a large intestine: 1 semicolon

j.. 1000 aches: 1 kilohurtz

k.. Basic unit of laryngitis: 1 hoarsepower

l.. Shortest distance between two jokes: A straight line. (think about it for a moment)

m.. 453.6 graham crackers: 1 pound cake

n.. 1 million microphones: 1 megaphone

o.. 1 million bicycles: 2 megacycles

p.. 2000 mockingbirds: two kilomockingbirds (work on it....)

q.. 10 cards: 1 decacards

r.. 1 kilogram of falling figs: 1 Fig Newton

s.. 1000 cubic centimeters of wet socks: 1 literhosen

t.. 1 millionth of a fish: 1 microfiche

u.. 1 trillion pins: 1 terrapin

v.. 10 rations: 1 decoration

w.. 100 rations: 1 C-ration

x.. 2 monograms: 1 diagram

y.. 8 nickels: 2 paradigms

z.. 3 statute miles of intravenous surgical tubing at Yale University Hospital: 1 I.V. League