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A Code Of Ethical Behavior For Patients

 

  1. DO NOT EXPECT YOUR DOCTOR TO SHARE YOUR DISCOMFORT
    Involvement with the patient's suffering might cause him to lose valuable scientific objectivity.

  2. BE CHEERFUL AT ALL TIMES
    Your doctor leads a busy and trying life and requires all the gentleness and reassurance he can get.

  3. TRY TO SUFFER FROM THE DISEASE FOR WHICH YOU ARE BEING TREATED
    Remember that your doctor has a professional reputation to uphold.

  4. DO NOT COMPLAIN IF THE TREATMENT FAILS TO BRING RELIEF
    You must believe that your doctor has achieved a deep insight into the true nature of your illness, which transcends any mere permanent disability you may have experienced.

  5. NEVER ASK YOUR DOCTOR TO EXPLAIN WHAT HE IS DOING OR WHY HE IS DOING IT
    It is presumptuous to assume that such profound matters could be explained in terms that you would understand.

  6. SUBMIT TO NOVEL EXPERIMENTAL TREATMENT READILY
    Though the surgery may not benefit you directly, the resulting research paper will surely be of widespread interest.

  7. PAY YOUR MEDICAL BILLS PROMPTLY AND WILLINGLY
    You should consider it a privilege to contribute, however modestly, to the well-being of physicians and other humanitarians.

  8. DO NOT SUFFER FROM AILMENTS THAT YOU CANNOT AFFORD
    It is sheer arrogance to contract illnesses that are beyond your means.

  9. NEVER REVEAL ANY OF THE SHORTCOMINGS THAT HAVE COME TO LIGHT IN THE COURSE OF TREATMENT BY YOUR DOCTOR
    The patient-doctor relationship is a privileged one, and you have a sacred duty to protect him from exposure.

  10. NEVER DIE WHILE IN YOUR DOCTOR'S PRESENCE OR UNDER HIS DIRECT CARE
    This will only cause him needless inconvenience and embarrassment.


With the compliments of Cecilie Thorning Jacobsen,thorning@stud.mdb.ku.dk, Please don't erase this part of the file when you copy or distribute it - someone might wish to contribute with additional paragraphs.

This article was added to LaughNet on Tuesday 09 August, 2005.


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